Where is my place in the sun?
Until a couple of years ago all the talk on expat blogs and forums was of people moving to France from the UK, and a large number of people followed the so-called ‘dream’. Many came, many left, but pretty much all the UK expats that I know of here in France now are those that were already here five years ago.
The celebrated wave of arrivals seeking ‘a place in the sun’, keenly pursued by numerous television crews and journalists, doesn’t seem to have worked out quite as expected for most people, who usually stayed for about 18 months then packed their bags and left as suddenly as they arrived.
A couple of years ago most of the arrivals stopped arriving, and the newspapers started writing ‘Why I can’t stand my place in the sun’ type stories, mostly featuring people who arrived in France with 50p and three words of French and were surprised to find that TV is not reality. Actually that rather rude and sarcastic comment ignores another truth – that many people left for reasons as much to do with ‘the French’ as because of financial issues, but that’s another story for another day…
But once again I hear a whispering in the expat world. Comments about buying property in France or moving to France seem to be nudging upwards, interest in moving to France seems to be increasing again, and journalists are perhaps hoping for another free holiday in the sun, in pursuit of happy expats.
Just in case some of our readers are thinking of making the move this year, I thought I’d best explain something that the television doesn’t make clear: MOST EXPATS IN FRANCE HAVE TO WORK HARD TO MAKE A LIVING.
If your ‘living the dream’ involves sitting around all day not doing very much, I’m afraid I’ve got a bit of bad news for you – it will only work out if you are rich or have a decent pension coming in. Despite doing a very wide range of jobs, the expats I know of that are here all share one characteristic – they all spend a lot of time and effort working and very little time sipping rosé by the pool. Yes, even me, I’m sorry to say.
I imagine that somewhere in France, even now, there are writers sat looking out across pastoral countryside and playing boules with the locals while scribbling the next chapter of ‘A Year in Gascony’, but if they exist I am yet to meet them.
Don’t let me put you off coming out with the next potential wave of expat Brits – I’m all for taking chances myself – but remember, for most of us, we hardly know if our place is a ‘place in the sun’ or not since we are busy getting on with our work, not having a perpetual holiday. But if you are adventurous, practical, hard-working AND don’t mind an occasional bit of sunshine, you might just make a success of it!
I think so many think the grass in greener on the other side of the hill. We have lived in both France and Germany. In the end we decided to live in Britain. We did not like living in Germany, but enjoyed France, but in the end we decided that having only lived abroad after we were 50 we just miss that bit extra so that you know what makes a country tick, for better or worse, we never felt we fully understood just what went on and that it would never be like home.My advice to anyone is to rent out your house in the UK for 12 months and do the same in the country you want to live in. After 12 months you will know if its for you or not.We lived in Germany for 3 years and France for 1. We knew it was not for us and are very settled now.
I am researching my book on the Rhineland and all the changes that took place there, I could never have done it if I had not lived there.
Great advice Boris as so many just fall in love with places but living there can be just so different as many find out the hard way.
France can be good, but, as you say, if you have to work for as living, then France can be very hard going.
Do tell us more about what you mean about the reasons for leaving
‘the French’.
Hello.
I’m french and i live in south Burgundy. I have many friends who come from England (London, often) and live in my area.
My first surprise is that often, when brit friends of mine make a party, i and my wife are the only “french of the team”. Reason :
1 – my wife is an english teatcher and i “can” speak english (two or three words)… and i don’t know a lot of french people in the village who can do the same. Surprise ?
2 – our english friends (Chris, Wendy, Sue, Bill, Georgie, Paul, John, Vivian, Lisa, Martin and many more…) can speak a word in French (except : bonjour merci au revoir).
A good part of them talk about getting back in England… since years, but it they have difficulties to live in France, they often have the same to imagine to be back. Sometimes they do. And sometimes come again… but a good part of them want to stay and are happy…
They are specialy when they make relationship with people of the area, and it’s not easy, nobody are waiting for them, when they can talk a bit of french (everybody excuse a very strong accent, it’s charming), and accept that life in deep deep France is of course very different of what they seen on TV and on a postal card.
Last point : i have, from my work, relations with people from Great Britain, Germany, Netherlands and Switzerland… and, not so hard to believe, people who are closer to french are people from UK. Yes. Some of those British Team i have in my region are now some best friends of mine.
Please, come again in France. Read again the article Boris wrote, and be welcome with us.
And excuse my poor english.
Franck
flyintheweb, there are some things I choose not to write about, if they may not be appreciated by people who I know and who I live near. This includes both general comments on the French and their way of doing things, and many expat stories where the people in the story would recognise themselves and be offended. I do like living here and upsetting or annoying everyone around me may not help that much!
Franck, your story is beautifully written, thank you for sharing your thoughts. I think you are exactly right when you say:
and it is true that ‘ife in deep deep France is of course very different of what they seen on TV and on a postal card‘!
What a fascinating subject, Boris! We’ve lived in France for nearly 15 years now and we don’t envisage living anywhere else. We have three children in local schools, which tends to concentrate the mind when it comes to surmounting problems, versus packing up and leaving. Like you, although we’ve seen them come and go, most of the English that we have known since we came here may have moved on, but are still very much in France. It is hard work to make a living, but what a quality of life you have as your reward, particularly for children. Sorry if this is long!
You’re right about children focussing the mind Janet, it’s the same here – it makes us much more hesitant about moving again, within France or elsewhere. Luckily we’re also happy here and in no rush to move either. I sometimes forget that people without children have such freedom to do just as they like!!
Well we had a large movement of French people in to Britain today to watch their side put up a very creditable win over Scotlad at Murryfield. The French looked very strong and will be the ones to watch, to win the 6 Nations this timr. Its 100 yeras ago this year that the French joined to 4 nations to make 5.
A very sporting game by both sides and a credit to sport.
No one can remember ever seeing so many French supporters in Scotland.
Well done France.
je sus d,accord avec ca!
We recently returned from France after 5 years there. Although we enjoyed it on the whole, the credit crunch had other ideas for us. We thought we’d got it right as husband continued his freelance work in the UK so we didn’t need to earn a living there. Our oldest child was very unhappy in France and the younger one was bullied badly so in the end, the decision to return to the UK wasn’t a difficult one. We still have our house in France but I’ve no regrets either about moving there or leaving.
Ooooh This is such an interesting subject! You are completely right that making a living is the number one priority that seems to be sometimes forgotten. Most Brits I know, if they are working, run their own buisnesses. Mainly in building, gardening or hospitality services. Jobs are scarce and it requires dogged determination and patience to gain ‘equivalences’ of UK gained qualifications if you don’t want to be doing the most menial of jobs on minimum wage. I know I have been there! Like you say, it seems the ones who ‘make it’ are the ones who work very hard to do so. Perhaps they do so because they genuinely love France and the French and not just the ‘place in the sun.’
Franck – merci de faire l’effort d’ecrire en Anglais. Je sais bien que ce n’est pas facile d’exprimer vos sentiments dans une autre langue. Chapeau!
Like you, we have been here in France for several years (9 now!) , and have two children happily/successfully going through the French school system.
We have often discussed what contributes towards a successful Expat experience. How about:
1. Speak the language! Not brilliantly but good enough to mingle with your new neighbours and make friends with them. Just a little effort on your part, and you will be welcomed.
2. Avoid latching on to only English people as friends! You would miss out on the very things that make life here so great – the sense of community, etc.
3. Do not come if you need to get a regular job in order to have an income straight away! Employment laws are strict and finding employment (especially in rural areas) can be VERY difficult.Why would they choose a UK person when there are so many fluent French speakers looking for jobs….
4. Be prepared to work hard! And think through (early on) a backup option of setting up your own business if extra income is necessary (eg gites).
5. Leave your ‘We are English, and aren’t we superior to you lot’ attitude behind! You might have been a hotshot Exec in London, but down here you are just ‘Ah – la mere de …’ in the school playground.
6. Do your homework before you decide to move – is it really the life you want or are you imagining a year long holiday in the sunshine & on the beach….just like when you are on holiday for 2 weeks in the summer.
7. Set a time limit – say, give it two years & then review.
We all love our life here, especially our daughters, and would not change it for the world. But you have to ride out the storms as well eg like when the exchange rate goes down!!
Jacqui, did you actually sit down and talk about what was best after two years? We came out with that intention but somehow forgot to do it when the time came.
This is my favourite!
Hubby & I did discuss after 2 years, but not explicitely (?) with the girls.
We never let on to them that there was a ‘trial’ period because we took the attitude of ‘this is it, so we ALL have to make it work’ with them.
After about 2 years we talked to them about their life in France versus their memories of living in the UK, and I have to say – they never wanted to go back, even though they missed friends etc. We made sure they kept in contact, and our eldest’s best friend is still the little girl she met on her first day at school back in Surrey aged 4! They visit each other’s home every year – even though they are now pushing 20 years old!!
Having a younger daughter who has always been chatty in any language, even when she could not actually speak French – meant that she was well known to all the children in her new school here, and their siblings, parents, granndparents, etc! If either hubby or I venture to the local town where her junior school was – we are still recognised by our association with her! How the mighty have fallen…..
Hubby gets most embarrassed when he invariably finds the nurse giving him a bed bath whilst in hospital, is the mother of one of our daughter’s school friends….
Ok, I stand accused of bemoaning bad lane discipline and lack of indication when i’m out on the road. I throw my arms up into the air in exasperation when the girl at the bank refuses to acknowledge my presence when she takes the third phone call in a row and, occasionally, I will stamp my feet and blame it all on ‘Frenchness’. But, today it was beautiful, the sun shone and I was able to take some time off work and go out to lunch. By the end of today I thought “Actually, where else could I pay peanuts for a fab lunch overlooking some of the most beautiful coastline in the world, go for a walk along a sandy un-crowded beach, travel unhindered by traffic jams through rolling green pasture back to a lovely home in the countryside” That’s what keeps us here. 20 years later after a lot of toil because, as Boris said, the journey isn’t easy, it’s very hard work but it HAS been worth it. Nobody will ever become cash rich living here and if that’s your dream, forget it. The best pleasures to be found in France are free but not without sacrifice.
Debbie you’ve reminded me that I live more than two hours from the sea, the one little omission in our plan! Today is one of those days when I would have liked to have a sea breeze to cool things down slightly and go for a stroll on the sand…
So Sorry !
Great article but this line really stands out:
“MOST EXPATS IN FRANCE HAVE TO WORK HARD TO MAKE A LIVING.”
After living in Nice for 5 years all I can say is this is a bit of an understatement! Any readers thinking of making the switch bear this in mind!
Glad it’s not just me then!